A quick note on terminology

Hey everyone,

So, something has been bothering me for a while, but I wasn't quite sure how to broach the situation. I finally decided to bite the bullet and go for it.

Here at FacialForum we pride ourselves on being very sex-positive and egalitarian. Our number one rule is "No degrading, mean, rude or nasty comments." This rule has been expanded upon to include no derogatory terminology toward women outside of the confines of consensual fantasy/play. For example, you all are more than welcome to call Nyxia a slut, but not a bitch; Piper loves being told what a whore/slut she is, so long as it is always done respectfully. This type of language is only permitted within the confines of a consensual, fantasy setting and our mods are fantastic at enforcing polite discourse. I honestly can't applaud them enough for making this forum a safe, welcome, and inviting place for people to express themselves, regardless of what they look like, what their fetishes are (within the rules) and what their gender is.

However, this brings me to my main point. There is an unfortunate trend to not extend this same courtesy to transgendered individuals. There are several threads where trans-women are referred to as "shemales" or "trannies" or other derogatory terms, or where trans women (Bailey Jay, as a beautiful example) are referred to as "he" instead of the appropriate "she." This is extremely worrisome and can potentially alienate many trans individuals who would otherwise feel comfortable expressing themselves here. In fact, I have purposefully not introduced this forum to some of my trans friends who would otherwise enjoy it, precisely because this type of language is permitted.

I know that trans issues are not exactly well known, and I am sure that many people using these terms on the forum are unaware of their slurred nature, but I hope that this post will help start to change that.

Transgendered individuals deserve the same respect and courtesy we give to our cisgendered members (cisgender being the term for people who do not transition from one end of the gender spectrum to the other).

Thank you all for your time.

Yeah, I really don't know much about that topic at all. What do they prefer to be called? It would seem to me that all the performers always have videos titled "She male suck off" or "tranny surprise" and the like. Kind of confused now.:confused:

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Originally Posted by The Shape

Yeah, I really don't know much about that topic at all. What do they prefer to be called? It would seem to me that all the performers always have videos titled "She male suck off" or "tranny surprise" and the like. Kind of confused now.:confused:

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The preferred terminology is "trans woman" or "trans man."

They use derogatory slurs in porn for the same reason they are called "Back Door Bitches" instead of "Women Who Really Love Anal." I mean, porn titles are a pretty bad place to look for sensitive labeling :P

Yeah like I said I have no interest in the subject so I don't know much about it. I also don't know how big of an issue that really is at the "Facial Forum" which is really about facials but seems these days that is not really the focus like it used to be.

Oh well to each their own I always say.

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Originally Posted by The Shape

Yeah like I said I have no interest in the subject so I don't know much about it. I also don't know how big of an issue that really is at the "Facial Forum" which is really about facials but seems these days that is not really the focus like it used to be.

Oh well to each their own I always say.

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You should check out my new set. The facial is a little hard to see through the make-up, but that's Halloween for ya!

Thanks Nand I will check that out. I think people who are interested in the Trans stuff pretty much keep to certain threads. If anyone says something derogatory about any group of people here regardless of their gender or orientation we try to stamp it out quickly. We also count on you members to point it out if we miss it:cool:

Thanks for the education. Its always cool what you can learn here!

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Originally Posted by nand

...Here at FacialForum we pride ourselves on being very sex-positive and egalitarian. Our number one rule is "No degrading, mean, rude or nasty comments."...For example, you all are more than welcome to call Nyxia a slut, but not a bitch; Piper loves being told what a whore/slut she is, so long as it is always done respectfully.

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And in capitols. ;) ie: Whore/Slut

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Originally Posted by nand

There is an unfortunate trend to not extend this same courtesy to transgendered individuals. There are several threads where trans-women are referred to as "shemales" or "trannies" or other derogatory terms, or where trans women (Bailey Jay, as a beautiful example) are referred to as "he" instead of the appropriate "she." This is extremely worrisome and can potentially alienate many trans individuals who would otherwise feel comfortable expressing themselves here.

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A serious loss to this all accepting Kinky community.

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Originally Posted by nand

I know that trans issues are not exactly well known, and I am sure that many people using these terms on the forum are unaware of their slurred nature, but I hope that this post will help start to change that.
Transgendered individuals deserve the same respect and courtesy we give to our cisgendered members ...

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Originally Posted by nand

The preferred terminology is "trans woman" or "trans man."...

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I was totally unaware of this even though I shouldn't have been. LGBT is something that is everywhere for me. Transgender bars are practically the only bars I frequent in the country mainly because of the positive, all inclusive atmosphere that exists inside them. It is rather embarrassing to me that I was ignorant on this issue. :(

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Originally Posted by The Shape

Thanks Nand I will check that out. I think people who are interested in the Trans stuff pretty much keep to certain threads. If anyone says something derogatory about any group of people here regardless of their gender or orientation we try to stamp it out quickly. We also count on you members to point it out if we miss it

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Doesn't Facial Forum Rock!!! You and the other moderators/admins are the reason I am here. ;) Keep up the great work, The Shape.

In fairness, I do see threads go through that refer to women in derogatory terms. I don't think we will see the end of of the use of derogatory terms for transgendered people. But we can hope. :)

Rep to both of you.
Piper

Acceptance of anything that may be considered "alternative" is something I think the forum prides itself on.

If it's legal and nobody is getting hurt then the atmosphere is "be yourself" and I am happy to be a part of that.

Although it's not my thing and I have no interest in it I still see that it's necessary to welcome them here and to make sure they are not demonized and degraded for being who they choose to be.

We accept all good people here regardless of race, gender or sexual preference. Maybe the world would be a better place if it followed those guidelines.

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Originally Posted by The Shape

...We accept all good people here regardless of race, gender or sexual preference. Maybe the world would be a better place if it followed those guidelines.

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Yes, it would!! :p :p :p
Piper

Thanks for educating us. I do like that FF is a comfortable place and hopes it will be for everyone.

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Originally Posted by The Shape

We accept all good people here regardless of race, gender or sexual preference. Maybe the world would be a better place if it followed those guidelines.

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Oh, it totally would be!

Very informative what nand wrote.

I use the same terms, though in NO mood to disgrace anyone !
I thought "shemale" was like, u know, OK ... but I think I must train my brain to change and be more careful when I write !

A pretty difficult issue for me. Being Spanish and not a high-lever English writer/reader, I have always though "shemale" was an OK term.

Here in Spain we have tha same problem, too: it's usual talking about transgender people referring to his/her born gender, not the one chosen by them.

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Originally Posted by gloryholeprincess

And in capitols. ;) ie: Whore/Slut

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Is this the proper, official way to erotically but respectfully use the term? Similar to Dom (I) / sub (i) in the BDSM community?

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Originally Posted by LasseBosch

Is this the proper, official way to erotically but respectfully use the term? Similar to Dom (I) / sub (i) in the BDSM community?

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Definitely not in here, the staff frown upon the use of insulting terminology like this, so threads or remarks of this ilk will not stay in here for long!!

Members must bear in mind that, (thankfully :p), this is not exclusively a male forum, so we would not wish to insult or anger any of our female members by having them put up with degrading names of this sort...

...However, certain of our lady members, like Piper, enjoy these taglines so they may be cool with referring to themselves this way.

In short it is acceptable for the lady members to describe themselves like this but not for you guys to use these terms in such a general haphazard fashion.